Dear Pastor, I know God loves everybody but He never met my sister.
Yours sincerely, Arnold. Age 8, Nashville.
Dear Pastor, My father should be a minister. Every day he gives us a sermon about something.
Robert, Age 11, Anderson.
Dear Pastor, I'm sorry I can't leave more money in the plate, but my father didn't give me a raise in my allowance. Could you have a sermon about a raise in my allowance?
Love, Patty. Age 10, New Haven
Dear Pastor, My mother is very religious. She goes to play bingo at church every week even if she has a cold. Yours truly,
Annette. Age 9, Albany
Dear Pastor, I think a lot more people would come to your church if you moved it to Disneyland.
Loreen. Age 9. Tacoma
Dear Pastor, Please say a prayer for our Little League team. We need God's help or a new pitcher.
Thank you.
Alexander. Age 10, Raleigh
Dear Pastor, My father says I should learn the Ten Commandments. But I don't think I want to because we have enough rules already in my house.
Joshua. Age 10, South Pasadena
Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon on Sunday. Especially when it was finished.
Ralph, Age 11, Akron
A local pastor and church member stood by the side of the road holding up a sign that said, "The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before it's too late!"
They planned to hold up the sign to each passing car.
"Leave us alone you religious people!" yelled the first driver as he
sped by.
From around the curve they heard a big splash. "Do you think," said one clergy to the other, "we should just put up a sign that says 'bridge out' instead?"
One day a Pastor and a Brother took a Visitor fishing on boat.
Once in the Middle of the lake, the Pastor said" I seem to have forgotten my fishing pole, be right back" and to the visitors amazement stepped out of the boat and walked on top of the water towards the shore.
When he had returned, the Brother said
"I need to use the restroom, be right back"
Again the visitor watched in amazement. Once the Brother returned, not wanting to be outdone, the visitor said " I need to use the restroom too"
As soon as he stepped out of the boat, he sank.
The Pastor nudged the Brother and said "We should have told him where the rocks were"
There's this guy who had been lost and walking in the desert for about 2 weeks. One hot day, he sees the home of a missionary. Tired and weak, he crawls up to the house and collapses on
the doorstep. The missionary finds him and nurses him back
to health. Feeling better, the man asks the missionary for
directions to the nearest town. On his way out the backdoor, he sees this horse. He goes back into the house and asks the missionary, "Could I borrow your horse and give it back when I reach the town?"
The missionary says, "Sure but there is a special thing about this
horse. You have to say 'Thank God' to make it go and 'Amen' to make it stop."
Not paying much attetion, the man says, "Sure, ok."
So he gets on the horse and says, "Thank God" and the horse starts
walking. Then he says, "Thank God, thank God," and the horse
starts trotting. Feeling really brave, the man says, "Thank God, thank God, thank God, thank God, thank God" and the horse
just takes off. Pretty soon he sees this cliff coming up and he's
doing everything he can to make the horse stop.
"Whoa, stop, hold on!!!!"
Finally he remembers, "Amen!!"
The horse stops 4 inches from the cliff. Then the man leans back in the saddle and says, "Thank God."